I yanked the new OEM Mother Kaw seal I had put in and measured it ... 20.0 OD and 10.5 ID ... clearly not going to give any sort of a tight/interference fit on a 20.0 bore.
The replacement seal I installed went in much tighter (it measured 20.2 mm. The ID was at 11.5 or so mm for the 12 mm shaft). Used a 14 mm deep socket to set it all the way to the bottom of the bore. So far no leaks and the outer diameter does not rotate when rotating the shifter shaft ... so I am guessing this is going to be golden.
The bottom line is sometimes the OEM seals are defective ... good thing it was only a few bucks ... but certainly aggravating.
With regards to the lean angle on the side stand ... this bike is suffering of the common worn frame mount which is a bit ovalized and a good mm out of round. Squeezing the side stand in the vise to reduce the play did not help. So I've decided to opt for the 2x4 for now to keep it more vertical until I have the time and energy to fix properly.
The bike is up and running. Its been a fun couple months to get all the leaks and small stuff fixed ... took it for a 10 mile test ride today
... I had forgotten how much fun these are!